My Worth…Your Worth

“The very nature of this materialistic society dictates…seperation from ourselves. It is not who you are but what you produce or consume.” Dr Gabor Mate

Our society is one of materialism, it values what we do and what we consume. It values our give and take of material things and EVERYTHING has a value….except those that cannot contribute to the material of the world; old people, people experiencing illness physical and mental…

This is the world I am learning I grew up in, and still flourishes around me. It is a part of my belief systems at a deep level, one which I did not choose but was programmed with in me. This is a new discovery and one now that I need to deal with explicitly.

Three years have gone by, the mother cares for her teenage child, giving him the space and security to come to grips with the anxiety and depression he has experienced on a colossal scale. His world became so small and society had no way of assisting. It was up to her. She experienced her own anxiety and depression, situational and struggled to even hold a conversation as her world was torn apart with the fears and possibilities that existed for her child. The smile and laughter were often forced but she knew it was important to keep a semblance of normality as she watched her other son growing up in a more average way, with the weight of his brother on his shoulders. This mother stayed up to all hours supporting her unwell son as he became nocturnal. She worked to portion his food in such a way that he ate. She spoke to him only when he was ready in a calm soothing voice no matter what her stress. She spoke with others and created a safe haven for him wherever he was. As he grew stronger and stepped out more into the world she became his out, so that he was never stuck and could always leave, she became the enabler for him to join in conversations and she became his person to bounce ideas off, discuss important topics about life, love and sex  and get trusted advice from. She nurtured his emotions and all within the family ensuring they all knew that they were loved, unique and accepted. She organised and advocated for holidays that encouraged but did not force him to do more than he was ready for. His world is expanding, he is healthy, he has restarted his education and he perceives a future for himself.

What is the worth of this woman? What does she do that contributes to the material of the world, what does she consume in her small world, what is her value?

I have devalued her. I have thought less of her as she is not working and bringing in money and using her talents for the greater good. I have felt she is just floating, irrelevant to the world and that she is of no consequence. How wrong and dangerously undermining was I.

I am now willing  to value that which does not contribute to the materialism of this world. I am ready to be a part of valuing myself, not by other peoples standards, or my own standards, but simply from within. I am of value, I exist. You are of value too. And I acknowledge your value; YOU EXIST!

Thank-you for reading and I hope this allows you to find a greater acceptance of yourself and others, this is where I believe the power of Peace lies.


Sillustani, Peru



About R Congues

Funny enough, this blog has become the expression of my hopes, dreams, love and experiences. It came about because of the situation I discovered I was in, and I am delighted to see it grow and heal into something different: I am a parent of two children, one who has experienced severe anxiety that became disabling in all aspects of their life. I am a teacher of Maths, Science and Religious Education with a Masters in Special Needs Education; I am a qualified Reiki master, with a love of art and creative experience. I am not a professional in the fields of psychology or medicine. (If you are interested in these perspectives there are many internet sites to use.) I am simply expressing my experience in my own unique way.
This entry was posted in Anxiety, Depression, Healing, Insight, Parenting, Teenagers and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to My Worth…Your Worth

  1. thefeatheredsleep says:


    Liked by 1 person

  2. maggies90 says:

    Brilliantly said Rachael. It is has been a mammoth effort and parents – mothers like you – taking actions like that, contribute to enabling others to be and become. Maybe not so materialistic or economical in the public sense but so valid for everyone. Yours is an incredible story and one that has enabled me to support my parenting differently to the expectations I had of myself; it has given me courage to fight for my children’s rights and to seek out for their needs rather than fulfilling my own expectations. Blessing to you and yours.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Blog Posts Of Note (January 2016) –

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