Dark Night

Words of self hate scream through my head
The body tenses, all sensation dead
Nerves are haywire, reverberating pain and dis-ease
I  am wanting to die, Give up and releive
Breathing consciously I stop and move slowly
Each moment stretches on wards, I trust in my breath
I hear the voices and choose not to listen
Instead to find hope I search for the evidence
A family I Love and who Loves me back to
The Earth ever sweet beneath my feet, always true
The cool crisp air creating chills in my bare legs
The warmth of the tea in my hands in my mouth
The soft furry coat wrapped around my body
The bright car lights sweeping past in a hurry
The Joy that I’ve experienced, the laughter the silliness
The hugs and the smooches from my cat whose so grumpy
Challenged to go beyond the feelings that I experience in each moment
The self Loathing dissipates and I am renewed in my own being
Rising through the darkness of the night
I am not leaving soon, I am willing to fight
Going beyond the doubts and fears of who I am
Claiming it all, I am obedient to the goodness of me
Shadows may come to question my path
I choose to listen, consider, but not blindly buy into their wrath
For that is what they bring when I trust only them
I look to the light, to the hope, I will win.

 

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About R Congues

I am a parent of two children, one who has experienced severe anxiety that became disabling in all aspects of their life. I am a teacher of Maths, Science and Religious Education with a Masters in Special Needs Education; I am a qualified Reiki master, with a love of art and creative experience. I am not a professional in the fields of psychology or medicine. (If you are interested in these perspectives there are many internet sites to use.)This blog is not about recommending medications or specific treatments.
This entry was posted in Anxiety, Depression, Love, Peace, Poetry and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Dark Night

  1. Pingback: Dark Night | Janet Congues

  2. maggies90 says:

    Brilliantly written and I empathise with the feeling. Climbing back up is so hard yet so worthwhile.Yet remembering how and remembering that we have done it before helps me so much. Thank you for your courage to express yourself. I am finding it so valuable. Many blessings
    Janet xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

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