Disappearing Teenagers

Caught in a web of living and existing,
where the pace of it all is beyond measure,
Struggling to learn, to hone and to discover,
losing the battle with no pleasure.

The pain of connecting creates such rigid animosity within,
the fear of failure tangible, sour and acidic on the skin,
The loneliness of disconnecting favourable to the anger,
the fear of rejection and not fitting in.

Where do they go these children of ours?
Cut off from the world, disjointed, hidden.
Silently they slip into the pool of distant memories
Hopelessness boils their dreams endlessly.

Families are strained as they try to re-ignite
They strive to connect in, they breathe and they fight
Under the radar of shame and misunderstanding
Break downs and inner suction leave nothing to win.

So Young with so much to hope for, so much life yet to live
Breakdowns once the prerogative of the middle age,
Why are our teens suffering so?
Perhaps we live too fast for them to grow.

Tears roll from my eyes
As another person disappears
Into their sanctuary of being,
Away from their fears

This gift of life creates so much suffering,
Why is it this way,
Can we not do something about it,
Drug companies stay away!

To label is to load another cross to their pain,
There is no one answer
We are all different,
Yet the suffering is the same.

What are we doing to stem the flow of these bright lights?
Intelligent, witty, caring and Loving…
Why is their demise so scary and create such distance?
How can this universe make a the ultimate difference.

Blessed be the children, the innocent, the beauty,
May they face this world with honesty and take shelter when needed,
May they be supported by friends, community and culture
Their live all matter, they make the difference.

Posted in Anxiety, Depression, Fear, Parenting, Poetry, Social Phobia, Spiritual connections, Teenagers | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment



She beckons loud and clear,

She calls me to trust and be…

No rush, Gently forth, the coming of your life,

She patiently waits for me.

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Sealing the fate of this life

Sitting alone in the quietness of the room
Breathing with shallowness, anxiety looms
Who am I? Where do I go? What is my role?
What am I doing here, trapped in this waiting zone.

The moment unbroken, stretches on as the sunsets shadow,
Tears of energy roll down into nothingness
Succumbing to the ebb, head hangs down lower
Past the point of no return, bending like a flower.

Echoes of a past filled with laughter and joy
Projections of a future, pure fantasy employed
Bridging the gap into these times is the present
Elastic over stretched, no bounce, no return

Resilience is the key, but overeating is the default
Energy seems limited and catastrophe the revolt
How do you circumvent and transfer such intensity?
Deliver the black dog back into it’s entity?

The old woman stands at the end of her life
She beckons you, step forward,to see there is more yet to come
This moment of truth lays bare, all that could be
You have strength yet untapped, trust your own being

Rise to the challenge with courage and tact
Gently and kindly treat yourself with respect
The difficulties you face are played out again and again in your head
There is no escape or return, better to lay them out dead

Look not for excuses, quick fixes or help
You have all you need within, trust your first step.
Write of your pain and suffering to release
Then work towards your recovery with honesty and faith.

The world is reducing the tyranny that once ruled,
Exposed and degraded they will lose all that they sought
The upheaval will re-envisage the world made of Love
Perfectly placed are we now to convert the bad to the good

Vomit the evil from your life that you once consumed,
Surround yourself with goodness and no longer self abuse,
The old beckons you to stick to your path
The light shines so brightly upon her welcoming hearth

Simple is the way to keep true to who you are,
Clear your mind of thought simply be, you simply are,
The scars that tattoo your spirit are fading and healing,
Sit beside the violet flames of the universal sealing.

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The Dawning Day

High in the night sky, shimmering bright and carefree,
Whispers the night air, filled with darkness and energy,
looming into the light of the moon, echoes the shapeless forms,
Performing their tasks, upon the scents of the air that moves.10341448_10203879424964921_492254386031712249_n

Energy vibrates in the darkness, manifesting all beauty and delights,
Rapturous sounds that can be feared, and tiny chirping resounds,
Hailed by the Goddess with her might, stepping forth on her route,
To the timeless awaiting, of the spinning of the earth.

Endless and exciting, unstoppable and brash,
The tiny imprints of a ray of light, that cannot be touched,
Illuminating a beginning, where there is no true end,
Circling around, this energy transforms the inanimate with zen.

Without a glimpse of what is to come, the sky rounds up so very high,
Awakening the living from their night wanderings, spirits returning to their keep,
Moisture breathes upon the air, sighing of the possibilities,
The iciness intensifies, beyond any reasoning.



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Re-Frame the pictures in your mind, change perspective, move to a better time

Re-Write the stories that you tell, create new tones that uplift and dispel

Re-Sing the songs of your heart, let the rhythm sway your limbs

Re-Dance the steps of old, discover the messages hidden to behold

Re-View all of your worth and value every contribution

Re-Sign from negativity, allow the true signs to come into clarity

Re-Schedule your time to make the most of what is your passion

Re-Enter the memories and possibilities of joys and pleasures.



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Beginning again

Upon her pillow she lies in wait,
Ever elusive, intangible and late.
The mattress supports the stillness within
She moves not an inch, she cannot begin.
Eyes that are closed, chemicals pounding,
She despises her weakness, she succumbs to her fate.
With a deepening sigh, she relaxes her muscles,
Giving in to the demons, that lie in her wake.
Taunted by lovers, who ignore her needs,
She rolls into the corner, shrinking her being.
The demands never leave her, to be what she isn’t,
Strong, Courageous, loving and Giving.
Coldness seeps through her pores, she knows not why,
Attention is sought by all that Love and need her.
She mechanically pretends to be more than she is,
Embracing with much gentleness her own frailty within.
Spiralling as galaxy, across the endless space
She no longer recognises the long drawn face
The photos remind her of all that she once dreamed
Where is she now…Is the hope of once again being?
So walking the trek up mountains and through valleys,
She trusts in God’s wisdom, that this path of hers matters.
That somewhere, somehow the light will brighten her day,
Melting the shield that protects her in every way.
Clawing to life she starts to see changes,
Hope still exists, whilst fragile and unstable.
Seeking help and moving more, there seems to be less waiting,
The chemicals dissipate so slowly, it appears to be failing.
Persisting with great determination, sometimes she makes head way,
Then feels herself slipping backwards, she’s aware and unveiled.
This is the path of the darkest night,
Taunting and unending, dim and of great fright.
She knows in her heart that change always abounds,
Her desire to step forth and embrace it all is greater, she once more grounds.
And so the tango of a return to wellness continues,
She gently steps forward with her heart and offers her forgiveness.
Open and willing she will return from this fight,
And with support, Love and creativity she will regain her life.
One filled with laughter and Joy, Dancing and Singing,
Beauty and Divinity, this is only the beginning.

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Unleashing the Monster

Unleashing the monster who feeds on her soul,
She walks and she talks with no purpose or hope.
Despair ripens within her inner heart,
Overflowing, oozing juices contaminating it all.

Unforgiving and uncaring she still does what’s right,
The only one to suffer is herself, with such spite.
She undermines the good work that uplifts her energy,
It thumps to the ground, hard and full of nothingness.

Fear corrupts all of her good intentions,
It gnaws away at the truth of her soul.
Underpinning this is thoughts of her own worthlessness,
She feels tumultuous tossed on the sea of emptiness.

Rain beats down on her roof, echoing her loneliness,
The occasional reprieve of sunlight peeking in.
Dry tears do not fall, they too are so empty,
She silently calls for help… that appears non-existent.

Time has a magic if she can simply keep walking,
It heals the living, even when they are empty.
She trusts in this magic and holds true to her course,
Revisiting the old knowing that can steady her course.

Opening her heart to the wonders of this life,
She fakes it till she makes it, that’s the magic of time.
She welcomes into her life those of the light,
Allowing the energy to reignite her life.


Butterfly in Peru 2006

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Discerning her Truth

She wants so badly to belong to the song
That her family sings, calling her home
She takes a step renewed with Hope
That there lies the Support the Love and Growth

She dances right in, I am here, I belong
The looks of despair simply grow as do the groans
Here she goes again, she needs to be brought into line
That is not of our song, she must conform

So with a mighty hammer they seek to bring her down
Barbed words fly in her face, casting deepened frowns
She has heard the song and still believes she can open up
Her heart divulges her dreams, her dilemmas her life

With Jealousy and Judgement she is scarred yet again
Her retreat from the poison to late, she is dead
When will she learn that mere blood does not hold
The Love and Support she needs to energise and evolve

Sapped of her Hope and Bitter from the Truth
She attempts to rise above the bitterness that moves through
Looking through the lense of gentleness and peace
She sees their pain and their rigid beliefs

Stepping away she can still hear the song
She knows now this was the place she once belonged
The challenges were simply the opportunities to grow
And the Love that is there is filled with fear of the unknown

Reaching for her truth she can feel there’s a new way
She is forging ahead and is happy in herself each day
The difference she makes by simply being the person she is
Creates the space for new beginning and new songs to sing

Discerning the path to walk and dance she finds difficult and daunting
Walking away she knows there much more worth learning
Supported anew by the vibrancy of friends
This life of hers is worth living to the utmost of ends.

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Giving UP on waiting!!!!

IMG_20170311_133919[1]She waits in the shadows of her life for the right time
To step step centre stage into her lime light
She waits for her body to be perfect and thin
For her words to be articulate, sassy and bright

She works and she fails to lose the weight required
Fretting and wailing she continues to hide
Her words still ill formed, she feels stupid and weak
Fear of the mocking, moves her to retreat

Boldly she wants to launch on to the stage
Yet she waits for things to be just perfect
The truth she discovers is that her life is playing out
Nothing is happening, it’s boring, cause’ she’s not out

The wisdom of age resonates the need to give up
There is no such moment of perfection to give a start
Instead she needs to launch and choose to begin
Just one step it takes and who knows where it wends

The play of her life is richer for her presence
There is laughter, there is sadness, but most of all pleasure
For the pursuit of her life brings with it the passions
The abundance of learning and knowing are discoveredIMG_20170311_133931[1]

The light is bright and the shadows draw long
If she looks about she sees her cheer squad egging her on
The fears have melted and she discovers the perfection
Of begin with the imperfect and with it the golden edging

Curvaceous and beautiful, fluid and clear
Her life resonates messages that those willing do hear
As time moves on the barriers to living are withdrawn
The flowing of life allows everything to resolve

As the curtains come down she bows and she grins
This being your own life is worth everything
The cheers and the applause drown out the not knowing
She stands tall and proud and draws upon simply living.

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What does Loneliness Look Like?

In the flick of her hair, she jumps right on in,
Helping with the load, carrying food in,
She greets all with a smile, no frown is to be had
In the presence of God, she is safe, she has begun.

She falters not once, driven by her sense of duty
She talks and supports all those in her circle
With care and with Love she meets all who are new
Her abundance of giving continues to get her through

Vulnerability of hers remains hidden in the shadows
It persists in the silence when all else matters
Her eyes glaze over and she wonders why she is here
Her energy is spent, there are no more fears

Disconnected and content within she clings to the version
Of herself filled with life, reason and purpose
No one calls or reaches out, she is strong she is independent
The stillness outside penetrates deep into the recesses.

Depressed she is not, for she sees the wonders in this life
The sunrise and sunset, the cicadas that thrive
The “I heart you” as her son slips out the door
The wiggly waggly tail of the fur baby on the floor

These are not the things she is missing in her life
Perhaps it is more her own being of delight
The rampant child full of mischief and mayhem
The artist the musician, the dancer within

Where does her spirit go to play all the long day?
It waits with relish for the time to finally give way,
When the freedom to simply be without needing to align
With another’s perspective of what it means to be fine.

Loneliness is the loss of passion and meaning in life
Where connections are superficial and harbour the need to do right
Surrounded or alone, it matters not for her sense of being
When connected she is the super hero of every girls dream.

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